It's Over

I wasn't expecting any kind of ending with regard to the story.  But I actually didn't expect the end to be that way.  There are a lot of things that I still want to know.  A lot of reasons that I wanted to discuss, argue with [myself, that is], and justify.  I have read an article or two about Fyodor's style, one of which was a critque, the other a defender.  To tell you the truth, it almost made me stop reading the book for good, but I wanted to see how the end would be.

Anyway, the critic was right when he said that a lot of the story's characters are half-baked.  I think I should also add that a lot of sub-stories had no ending [nor beginning... at times] and you are left to wonder and speculate about the end of it, or even how it came about.  On the other hand, the defender justified that Fyodor tells his story about life as it happens; which means that probably, in real life, all things just happen - with no reason and no end.  For this part, I wholly agree with the defender.  The book is very long.  But that is because Fyodor had so much to say.  He discussed politics, religion, Catholicism as it happens in one's life, a day at a time.  The only thing is, somehow, Dostoevsky might have opted not to finish off with one topic deliberately because he feels that there were a lot more important issues n the story and that these issues are of another story.

I am touched by a lot of sub-stories in the book.  There were a lot of things that Dostoevsky was able to articulate and describe in detail.  There are a lot of issues that he discussed and the discussion of which has brought light to some of those things that I haven't thought of at all.  I was rather fascinated at how he discussed certain death [as in death sentence] vs. uncertain death [like an accident].  I couldn't quite articulate about these things.  So, I suggest that if you want to find out more, you should read the book.  There is a lot more than death, religion, politics.  But I was rather perplexed that the center of tha story seems to be love, but which I didn't find any kind or romance in it.  Romance in the figurative sense - not the literal.  So, it made me believe that his intention for this book was originally of political note.  Only using the affairs of Myshkin with the society that he chose to live with so that he can discuss [or vent out] his whims and qualms against the society he lives with in reality.

During my adventure with the book, I thought of maybe like doing it the way other writers did.  In a way that it's a book with a lot of stories, like Stephen King's 'Different Seasons'' where you can find the story, 'Rita Hayworth and the Shawshank Redemption.'  But then again, I contradicted myself for the book might lose its spontaneity and continuity.   Because in a way, the sum seems  not to be equal with its parts, so I think it was unwise for me to say that I can give an ending to each of the story had I proposed it that way.

If he was able to justify the adventures and misadventures of this idiot, I leave upon you to say for yourself.

Myshkin's Affectation

Everybody seems to be affected by Myshkin.  After their first impression of him being what he is, they come to him saying that he's the only TRUE person that they met at that time.  They want to be friends with him, seeking his relation as someone whom they will entrust with their individual affairs.

However, every since Myshkin talked to Rogozhin and told him about what he feels for Nastasya Filippovna, I couldn't help but think about his insincerity about this declaration.  Given the circumstances at the time of the revelation, what he said might not be truly what he feels.

He has been spending some time with Aglaia and he feels different every time.  Like the one we feels when we are with someone that truly interests us.  Someone we truly like but not necessarily love.  But still, I don't believe about what he feels for Nastasya.  Well, he truly might be an idiot for saying that.   A martyr?  Nah...  I don't think so.  It's probably the fact that he knows that he and Nastasya can't be.  Under any circumstance.

With Aglaia, on the other hand, there is a possiblity.  But considering the culture, there are some obstacles.  Aglaia seems to be trying to find a way to be with him.  But it is still too early to tell of her intentions.  Could it be that she is really in love with Myshkin?  Or is it possbile that she's just overwhelmed with Myshkin being the kind of person that he is?  As in those times and as they say, you cannot find someone like Myshkin in their society.

Common Grounds

One of the issues that Fyodor raised on this book, The Idiot,  is Liberalism.

This reminded me of the book that I read before this.  Colonel Aureliano Buendia fought almost all his life to fight for Liberalism, which I believe he never won after all those years.

Fyodor, however, is not so much fond of Liberalism.  He believes that Liberalism is not only "an attack on the established order of things," but the fact is, "it is an attack on the very essence of things."  I am not going to talk more of this, since I am not really in the position nor the knowledge of such things.

My issue is that as a traveller who travels through books, I could see that they have common grounds.  I don't exactly know how many years apart were these two books written (One Hundred Years of Solitude and The Idiot). But the fight for one common ground is there.  But, it is also safe to say that we do not know really if they are fighting for the same ideology, which I am sure some philosophers or historians would know.  This also reminds me of a movie I have once seen, "Cold Mountain" which I think (but I am not really sure) the war or battle was also with regard to Liberalism.

First Fit

Myshkin had his first fit today.

If I haven't said, he is epileptic.  This is also the reason why he was sent to Switzerland.  He received treatment which helped him in a significant way.  This was his first fit since he came back to Russia.

Have you every wondered what it feels like when they suffer from these fits?  We will never feel it because we are not, but let Fyodor take you into one of his fits, and you will imagine what it feels like, you will almost feel as if you're the one having the fit.

I wanted to rip off the part that describes what an epileptic goes through when he is about to 'get into' a fit; those few seconds before getting into it.  But I am afraid that it might be a spoiler for some.  So, after a few minutes of debate within myself, I decided to just leave it and let it be.

Fyodor describe the fit very effectively.  What really happens before they actually fall into that pit of darkness that only them could suffer?  This moment stayed with me even if I already closed my eyes to sleep.  The funny thing is, I almost thought of fearing that I myself might go into the fit,  affected by the way I imagined Fyodor's descriptions.

 It has been a long while already since I experienced having been affected by such stories and books.

Skoptsy

Skoptsy is a Russian word meaning "castrated one."  This is the main feature of the sect named the same and it existed in Russia during Myshkin's time.  It is a secret sect of Christianity that practices self-mutilation.  They believed that once you are castrated, you return to the state before Adam and Eve committed the Original Sin.

This was mentioned partially in The Idiot.  Roghozin's house being the haven of Skoptsy's at that time.  Myshkin's next visit when he came back to St. Petersberg was at Rogozhin's place where later on, he was introduced to Rogozhin's mother as his brother.  Rogozhin asked for his mother's blessings which she automatically gave.  He later told Myshkin that his mother doesn't hear anything anymore and that the blessings came automatically.  At this point, Rogozhin accepted defeat and told Myshkin that he is giving in.

My question is, did he finally give up, or is he into something else?

Ottical Sense

I haven't been with Myshkin for a few days now.  I've been busy over the weekend/holiday and didn't even have enough time to spend with him.

But anyway, the memories of Urusula is still very present.  While I was waiting outside the office for one of my errands, I deliberately refrained from looking inside the office while waiting for the documents to be done.  Instead, I focused on the sounds and imagined what was going on based on what I heard.  And to my surprise, I know I've been hearing those sounds before but actually overlooked it.

Ursula, by the way, is one of the most influential and lead characters on my journey with One Hundred Years of Solitude.  Since I've already finished with the book, I am coming up with a page about it later on.  But it's going to be much later (but I hope not... but it might be...) because I will be busy moving to a new house.  Gabriel Garcia Marquez is one good writer... really good.  I am appalled most of the time as to the vastness of his imagination; very creative.  She almost lost her sight to cataracts, making her discover the power of hearing.  This reminded me so much of my mom who had cataracts, too, and learned to live with the power of hearing, and smell as well.  This was justified again by Gabriel Garcia Marquez on the book.

Anyway, Myshkin was back in town after a long absence.  I was surprised that he visited someone I didn't expect him to.  Let's see if I could be with Myshkin tonight.  I want to know the purpose of his visit to this person.

Hello World!

So, I guess this is really Hello!

I have a few blogs here and there but I created this for what I shall call travels within my room.    This will involve a lot about the books that I will be reading.  Well, as for spoilers, I don't really want them either, so I would not try to put one.  But I have a question you might want to answer:  Are excerpts from books (like passages from chapters) considered spoilers?

I'll see how I can fix this site accordingly.  There are certain features here that I like that's why I sort of migrated, but it will take time to learn - hopefully, just a short time.

But in the meantime, I am with The Idiot and his fortunes and misfortunes.